I'm sorry. I don't speak Christianese.

Apologies for this not coming out on Tuesday, but I have been enjoying life with my wife and newborn daughter Reagan. So I had more fun holding Reagan than thinking about writing this weekend. So to make up for my absence, here is a picture of her on our drive home from the hospital. 

Now, onto the blog.
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Observation and Confession time.

We all have preferences. Mine?

Coffee? Two creams, one sugar.
Hamburgers? All the way.
Style of preaching? Conversational.
Leadership? Relational and influential.

As weird as this sounds, I don't like using jargon. Especially Christian jargon.

"Praise the Lord.
Amen, brother.
God is faithful like that.
Blessed and highly favored.
Saved. Sanctified. And filled with the Holy Ghost.
Bless their heart."

First, there came a point in my life when I realized that everybody doesn't talk this way. But our pastors and preachers have used these phrases from the pulpit for years. And people in the crowd know what they mean, or at least pretend they do.

When I figured out that non-Christians, and Christians who don't go to these types of churches, don't use or even understand these phrases, I made it a point to use terms everyone knows, with the intention to be understood by more people.

Obviously, I'm not the only one who feels this way. You probably feel the same, or at least know people who do. Pointing this out isn't all that significant. I know.

What I want to confess is that now, since it's been so long since I switched, I get agitated when I hear it. Annoyed even. And I've watched friends of mine even make fun of people who speak this 'Christianese'.

So I've come some sort of full circle.

I used jargon.
I noticed the problems with jargon.
I quit speaking jargon.
I get annoyed with people who use jargon.
I was annoyed at myself for getting annoyed at people using jargon.
And now I get annoyed when other people get annoyed for people using jargon.

And I don't really know what to think. Does this even matter? I think so because it negatively affects our attitudes towards other Christians. Do I have a solution? Besides getting over it? Nope. What do you think?

But again, I don't want a secret code that only certain people understand. I don't want people to need a translator to know that I'm giving them advice.


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Does it bother you? Do you think it's a big deal?

When Not Being OK Became OK

It shifted. It changed. And I never noticed. But I am so thankful that it happened.

I was in a small group in Savannah when someone made the simple comment, "This was before counseling was socially acceptable..."

Counseling.

People think it's normal now.

It used to be a shameful or embarrassing thing.

Now. It's encouraged. And that's huge. That was such an important shift in social thinking. Somewhere along the line people went from being ashamed of their problems and refusing help, to embracing the healing environment of counseling.

I remember being a tweenager and having friends who attended counseling. There was this unspoken pity for those troubled few.

Yet in college, I sat in a conversation with friends joking and making light of their counseling experiences. One in particular, a weightlifter with a strong social reputation said, "Oh yeah. I cried. He makes everyone cry. He told me, 'The five year old that lives in your heart, what has he been saying to you all this time?' And I cried like a baby. I couldn't stop!" And we all laughed. And we all felt comfortable.

And this led me to deal with my own brokenness. I thought, 'If these people that I respect are seeking help, laughing and comparing their stories, and if they are healing, then maybe it's time im dealt with the wound in my own heart."

I made counseling sessions. I talked. I listened. He didn't ask me the 5 year old boy question, so I didn't cry. If he did, I know I would have. Or maybe an emotional father-son story. Those always get me.

But I healed. I moved on.

I want you to know that about me. I was broken. And those conversations played a big part in my healing.

I want you to know that it's ok to ask for help. Ask a pastor or mentor.

I want you to know that your brokenness is not unique. There are others like you. I am like you. You are not weird or pitied if you ask for help.

You are human. Broken by a broken world.

Jesus said,

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." (John 10:10)

Your choice is to either live in brokenness, or to allow God to bring you to conversations that lead to healing.

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Have you too noticed this shift in thinking? Has a counseling conversation helped you move past a hard time in your life? Or do you need to set that appointment up now?